AUTHOR: Robin Dugall DATE: 6:59:00 PM ----- BODY:

I tell ya...this addiction to blogs has got to stop. I can't get enough. This one is from Mark Riddle...I love this guy! Walk with him as he describes what he would look for in a church. If he lived near me, I'd follow him to the same one. How about you? You in? What I Look For In A Church I've been thinking about this question a lot. I wanted to be able to give some answers that were truly thoughtful and sincere. Here's what I've come to: • I'd like pews that are more like the theater seats...you know, where you can raise or lower the armrests and even recline a little. I'd really like that. • I want to feel appreciated. Maybe a statue in my honor...or just a simple plaque on the wall. I think a personalized parking place may be a little much, but it would help me to feel appreciated. • Again, I'd still like to see more sexy people in churches. Like, is there a supermodel church or something? That would really be my kind of thing. Actually, it could just be sexy women. I don't really want my wife (who is a sexy woman) looking at sexy men...especially during church. • Fewer announcements. I mean, did Jesus make announcements? I don't think that's WWJD material. Heck, let's just go with no announcements. That's probably a more Scriptural approach. • Some type of free workout facility. Gyms these days cost too much money. That's my excuse. I'm certain that if I had a church that had a free workout facility I would actually do it and be a healthier person. That would also help me to fit in with the other sexy churchgoers. • I want a pastor who understands me. That would probably lead to him appreciating me more (see above desire). And that way when he's preaching he could look at me and we could exchange those knowing glances...maybe even wink at each other. You know, like we've got some kind of inside joke. • Some type of chocolate covered almond candy...I really like chocolate and almonds. • Also... fewer people that I don't like. People I don't like bug me. • Donuts - The good kind. With the frosting put on just right. Too much glaze makes me sick and distracts me from worshipping properly. Bagels might be a better alternative to the sexy church... but if there is a free work out room I can always spend a few more minutes on the Stairmaster. • Excitement - I think there should be hand-clapping, people who don't like hand clapping need to lighten up. Hand clapping may be the sole reason God gave us hands. That and the Michelangelo painting on the ceiling of that one place over in that foreign place. Yes enthusiasm is important. As long as no one gets to happy. I don’t want any blues brothers churches services. • The church needs to be run the way I would run it. • The children’s ministry needs to be run efficiently and it must keep the kids as long as it is convenient for me. • Colorful- a church should have nice colors. Like the colors in my house. It should be decorated well. • People should smile a lot. Even if their lives are in chaos, greeting me at the door with a smile is a more important witness of God than letting anyone in on their problems. I've been to many churches where people are just not happy enough. (See excitement) • Everything should be comfortable, convenient, and unique. • Good Priorities - the church should know how to put first things first like Stephen Covey says. • Spiritual Nugget - I want to leave each service I attend with a spiritual nugget. If I don't get my nugget then I've wasted my time that morning. If this happens often enough... I'll ask for the pastor’s job so I can get my nuggets. • Me- Sensitive - A church should be seeker sensitive but more importantly it should be me sensitive

--------